RELATIONSHIP

If You Can’t Be Loyal, Don’t Waste My Time

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I have never been a girl to ask a lot of a guy. I never asked him to give me all of his time, I never asked for things that could violate his own happiness, but I did always ask for loyalty. And that’s what I’m asking of you. If you can’t be loyal, don’t waste my time.

Don’t look at me like you have never seen a strong woman who knows what she wants. Don’t look at me thinking that I must be joking because I am not. For me, loyalty is the most important quality someone can have.

In my life I have been cheated on more often than not. Always by a man I trusted and loved with my whole heart. For some reason I was never good enough for them, they would always choose another woman and by doing that it I would always end up with a broken heart in my chest.

For that same reason, I am done with cheaters who don’t know how to keep it in their pants. I am done with men who pretend that I am the only one in their life while texting someone else. Because I am not blind, you know. I see the way you look when a beautiful woman walks by and I see the way you admire her.

If I was doing the same thing, you’d be upset, right? If I was looking at a man whenever he walked by, you’d tell me that I was disrespecting you, that I was being a jerk. But let me tell you that that’s exactly how I feel whenever you do the same thing. Sorry to disappoint you but I am not OK with that and I probably never will be.

I want you to reassure me that I am the only one for you by letting me see it in your actions. I don’t need your words, because they lie. It doesn’t mean that I am insecure, it means that I have had enough of other people making me feel like less just because I trusted them. So don’t make me doubt you, because at the first gut feeling that’s saying you have someone else, I will leave.

If I mean anything to you, you will respect that. I don’t want a man who comes home smelling like his ex or a man who tells me that he’ll ‘sleep at a friend’s house’ just to come home with a hickey and lipstick on his collar. These things don’t make me stay, this behavior doesn’t let me think that you love me. I don’t even know why you’d believe that it would. Why would you think that I would stay after I have seen you like this?

I am not asking you to buy me flowers every single day or take me out to dinner every weekend, I don’t want those things, I want you to spoil me with loyalty. Is that too much to ask of a man in this modern day dating?

For some reason, I am perfectly able to read the signs that tell me you’re a cheater. The way you avoid the truth and the way you talk about your ex-girlfriends. You can’t fool me by telling me that you were once a cheater. “Once a cheater, always a cheater,” is what I would say.

But if you do cheat on me and lose me, know that you will regret it. You will remember the woman who once was ready to give you everything she had and give you everything that you wanted and needed. You will have lost the woman who was prepared to be all yours for the rest of her life, a woman who doesn’t play games. You will remember what you have lost and I know that you will ask yourself what would have happened if you had been able to ignore your urges and if you had stayed loyal.

If you really do decide that a moment of pleasure is more important than a lifelong relationship with someone who loves you fully, then know that I will be fine. My heart may be broken and I may cry for a few days but I will be fine.

Because to myself, I am enough. I am even more than enough. I have learned it the hard way—to actually be able to see my own worth when no one else is able to do so. For that same reason, I won’t suffer. I will be just fine.